Going deeper
I wasn't surrounded by family all day yesterday, so I had some extra time for myself. It was really refreshing, actually. I started reading a booklet called "How Can I Feel Good About Myself?" while there was that awesome thunderstorm. I don't think it actually rained until later on (if it did at all or not I don't know), but the house shook with the sound of every thunder rumble. And I didn't even get wet while I was walking home.
Anyway, about the booklet. Usually I "feel good about myself," but I learned so much through reading. And I didn't even finish it yet :) But I still thought I'd share what I've been learning.
I've been a Christian ever since I invited Jesus into my heart at the age of five, and I have loving family and friends who have helped guide me closer in my walk with Him. There have been good times, and there have been rough times. But overall, I feel I have been blessed by my Creator. Who am I to think that I am worthy of this abundant amount of grace that my one and only Savior poured out to me? But still His love continues to amaze me. I have always struggled with certain things . . . such as totally humbling myself so God may use me for His good and perfect will. Yes, I must admit I have had difficulty with the issue of "pride." Ever since I was younger, I have been meticulous with what others thought of me. But in this booklet, I have been learning that the perspective we have on ourselves is different than God's. I have also been learning that God sometimes has to break me down before He can build me stronger (in character, spiritual strength, etc). It's like taking out an old building before you can build a new one on the same land. Often I hear about how we're supposed to die to ourselves, but I never understood what that really meant. In the same way, when I read in this booklet that we should love ourselves but also hate ourselves, I was confuzzled. I had always learned that we were to love our enemies as ourselves. But now I learn to . . . hate myself??? I'm still trying to figure out exactly what this means, whether it's the sin we should hate or if there's something more. One thing I found very interesting was that the book also boldly states that man can make himself into his own god (if he or she places themself higher than God Himself). It's so easy to hold something as an idol in our hearts, especially in this world that seems to focus on materialistic posessions. And sometimes we don't even realize it's an idol until someone points it out.
Indeed, I have been learning a lot about various things . . . especially through different experiences. Well, that's about it for me. I really should head out and get ready, now. Today's looking kind of busy. Have a great day!
posted by Sharilyn @ 9:45 p.m.
1 Comments:
Sharilyn:
Thank you thank you thank you, You are awesome!!!You always have something worthwhile to share, something to make me think and question what I thought I knew about myself. Your blog and Josh Winters blog are the BEST.... It is obvious to me that God is doing a great work in your lives.You are a blessing.
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